Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Personal Truth

I could write about a lot of things I have going on right now. But I am so... stunned(?) I guess by something... that I have to write about it. It's going to be very vague so feel free to skip this entry - look at the cool comic at the bottom though.

I have this friend. When I use the term "friend", I use it very loosely. I wrote a post awhile ago about how I lost a friend of mine. It was about him and while it is true that we don't have a "friendship" anymore... I still "know of him". Okay, I'll stop using quotation marks on every other word! This guy... he came off as the All American kind of guy even though he is Canadian. Liked the summers, showy cars, dressing a certain way, wanted to be tan year round... Disliked people who were different or extremely liberal... He was very opinionated and at the time... he seemed to know exactly what he wanted. I used to envy him in that way.

I have come to realize though... all was not what it seemed. From the outside looking in, he has changed a great deal. He became just like the people he used to make fun of. This is just amazing to me. How can someone change so much that they become the type of person they used to ridicule? Has he lost all sense of self? My opinion does not matter. I have no right to judge. But I just really wish I could find out - which one is fake and which one is real... Is he conforming to the personalities that are around him? Or did he finally realize the person he wants to become? Was he telling the truth when I got to know him? Or was it all show?

All of this just makes me realize how grateful I am for everything I have. It's not perfect. But I know who I am and what I want.

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